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The 7. 0 Most Memorable Characters of ‘Mad Men,’ Ranked. This list was incredibly difficult to create, especially since the finale could change everything. We’ll update accordingly after Sunday, if necessary, but, at least for this moment, here is our ranking of the vast panorama of characters who appeared on “Mad Men” during its seven incredible seasons.

What criteria was used? It’s hard to say for sure, but, “Who would we most want to share a drink with?” seems pretty solid. After all, it’s the “Mad Men” way. READ MORE: Review: ‘Mad Men’ Season 7 Episode 1. The Milk and Honey Route’ Finds Joy and Sorrow. Greg Harris. F— you, Greg. So many characters on “Mad Men” did so many terrible things, but the overwhelming majority of them found some opportunity for, if not redemption, then the opportunity to prove that they had some humanity within them.

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Greg was just the worst, from beginning to end. Poor Vietnam, to have Greg living within its borders. Greg makes this list only because it needs an absolute bottom (or top, depending how you look at it). Duck Phillips. Oh, man. How to rank Duck?

I mean, he wasn’t great to anyone in his life, but the way he’d periodically stagger about without any dignity technically makes me want to spare him some human sympathy… Wait. DUCK ABANDONED HIS DOG CHAUNCEY. QUESTION ANSWERED. Archie Whitman. What a dick. Hey! Guess it’s a family name. Abigail Whitman. It wasn’t Dick’s fault that his birth mother was a whore and his father was the worst, but she sure made him think it was.

Things could have been worse for the foundling, in theory — Abigail Whitman did keep a roof over his head. But Christian charity didn’t cross over too much into the realm of human kindness.

Lou Avery. Ugh. Anyone who makes a creative feel bad for wanting to do great work can go straight to hell. Or, I guess, Japan. Crash and burn in Japan, Lou.)6.

Midge Daniels. Aw, man. Midge. Don’s free- spirited girlfriend from Season 1 took a dark, dark turn in later years.

She’s a sad memory, for sure. She exited with one of “Mad Men’s” most memorable quotes about substance abuse: “It’s drinking a hundred bottles of whiskey while someone licks your tits.” But while her descent into drugs is tragic, her rather blatant manipulation of Don (even prior to the heroin days) makes her relatively unsympathetic. The Great Unnamed Masses of Women Don Has Slept With.

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Like the Hero with a Thousand Faces, but less to do with global trends in mythology and more to do with boobs. Never totally personality- less, but oftentimes indistinguishable. Conrad Hilton. Free trip to Rome aside, what a cocktease this guy was, am I right? Whatever, Connie. Margaret Sterling Hargrove. Sigh. Margaret. The hippie lifestyle might have treated some well.

It might have truly meant something to a lot of people. But in Margaret’s case, it was an excuse to abandon her young son and less- young husband. It’s nice that Margaret found greater depth beyond debutante/wife. But LADY YOU HAVE A KID.

Joey Baird. Joey follows a pretty classic “Mad Men” character path: seemingly likable and fun at first, then exposed as a charmless fraud and shooed out of the narrative almost immediately. He offered up some pretty classic dick behavior in his final days, but even if it did end badly, we’ll always fondly remember his “‘John’… ‘Marsha’…” banter with Peggy. Jane Siegel Sterling. Anything is possible on Finale Eve, but last we saw Jane, she’d pretty hardcore moved on from Roger, and it seems like they’re now on very different paths. While kind of a giant pill for much of her time on the show, Jane gave us the gift of LCD Roger, and for that we shall always be grateful. Bobbie Barrett. Everything that happened between Peggy and Bobbie was great! Everything that happened between Don and Bobbie was not!

Bobbie gets a pretty low placement as a result. Diana Baur. Technically the reason Don set off on his end- of- series sojourn was to find Diana, though Don’s rarely needed a compelling reason to go on walkabout, and he was obsessed with her even before he knew about her tragic backstory. Was that obsession justified?

Well, Elizabeth Reaser is a great actress. The character, like so many women Don was obsessed with, became a bit ephemeral. 5. Danny Siegel. Say this for the guy who played Jonathan on “Buffy,” he knew exactly what he had going for him and knew exactly what he wanted.

No wonder he was, ultimately, such a success in Hollywood. Adam Whitman. I never really understood why Adam committed suicide, but then again, sometimes there’s never really an answer to that question.

The fact that a reconnection with Don could have prevented it is… Well, of all the not- great things Don did over the course of the show, rejecting his half- brother wasn’t necessarily the worst. But Adam Whitman seemed like a decent person.

One deserving of a family to miss him. Arnold Rosen. What a doof. Dangerous Game Movie Watch Online. A nice doof. But, alas.

Mitchell Rosen. Also a doof. For different reasons from his father. But. Y’know. 5. 3. Shirley. Shirley’s roses, and the battle over them, is one of television’s most awkwardly passive aggressive moments, and she deserves this ranking if only because of that. Shirley herself, beyond her interactions with Dawn, never truly had a chance to blossom. But that’s the show’s fault, not her own. Jimmy Barrett. RANDOM TRIVIA ALERT: Patrick Fischler, an iconic Hey It’s That Guy, made a very memorable guest appearance in the “Millennium” episode “Jose Chung’s Doomsday Defense” as a representative of “Selfosophy.” He was also great as the fast- talking comedian whose big mouth caused no shortage of problems for Don, professionally and personally.

He’s not a great human being, necessarily, but got the short end of the stick. Helen Bishop. First she was the most scandalous addition to the neighborhood. Then she became a series regular on “Scandal”!

Coincidence? Yes. It was a coincidence. But while relatively underdeveloped, the only single mother on Betty’s block added some interesting edge to the first season.

Gail Holloway. She might sass Joan occasionally, but you gotta admire the way Joan’s mom pitched in to basically co- raise her grandson. Total team player. Sylvia Rosen. Don chose to seduce most ladies over the show’s seven seasons because, well, they were hot. Sylvia, tragically enough, seemed to engage Don’s interest mostly because of his self- destructive tendencies. And, like many women who fell into his sphere, she lacked real definition. She might honestly be more happy in her new relationship with an Avenger.

She certainly looks younger.)4. Carol Mc. Cardy. Oh, man, Joan’s lesbian roommate from Season 1! God, poor Carol; sexing with Joan’s discards and never getting what she wanted. Poor Carol. This is a pity ranking. She’s used to it, though.)4. Rebecca Pryce. Lane Pryce’s wife didn’t get much time on screen — compared to other wives — but the way she bristled and rebelled against the paths thrust upon her made her someone to respect. Rebecca wasn’t happy, but unlike other women of her generation, she didn’t suffer in silence.

Katherine Olson“You’re gonna get raped,” Peggy’s mother said upon learning that her daughter wanted to move to the city. You’re lonely? Get a cat,” her mother said upon learning that her daughter wanted to move in with her boyfriend.

Katherine Olson? Not a woman of modern sensibilities or massive compassion. Calvet. Oh, you Communist frog. You were a hoot. 4. Anita Olson Respola and Gerry Respola. Peggy’s sister and brother- in- law never made a huge impact, but the fact that Peggy was always relatively close with them (even during the rougher days, after Peggy’s adoption scandal and Anita’s struggle to handle it) helped her feel like a fully fleshed- out character. Also, the fact that Gerry helped (as much as he could) with Peggy’s maintenance needs indicates a certain level of compassion.

Lane Pryce. Loving Lane requires some application of selective memory.